Status Check

Had an eye appt. this morning. It's looking well. I will be able to return to normalcy in another two weeks. So I will be back in my classes on the 21'st and I have to go back to see him the morning of the 22'nd.

The implant lens is in place and looks secure. My eye pressure was a little high and now I have two eye drops to take. TobraDex four times daily as an antibiotic and Alphagan(P) twice daily for pressure. The long road to recovery is such a fucker.

I'm better now in thinking about Renell. It still upsets me, but not as much and for not nearly as long. I've got an idea of what I want to do and now have to make some choices. the long road to healing is such a fucker.

I know and recognize the stages of what I'm going through. I'd be even worse off if I didn't. It's odd to take that step back from myself and realize what I'm going through and analyze it. I shouldn't be able to do that. I should just have to deal with it; cope like other people do. The long road to sanity is such a fucker.

But in general, the eyes are better, I'm getting better. There are still points to work out but you just keep swimming right? I just don't get why it has to hurt. Pain, it has been explained to me, shows caring and compassion. I don't want that right now. Right now I want to be cold, I want to be stoic and just not let it bother me but it does, and it will continue to do so. The long road of life is such a fucker.