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It's been a while since I've written. No real idea what spurned it here and now. Things are.....what they are. I've been stuck again in a situation of sameness waiting for something chaotic to push me down so I am motivated to push back up.
I did get new glasses which is nice. And things are progressing again steadily but I sit here waiting for some bombshell to drop to motivate necessary change. I don't see it coming but then I never do.
One of the nice things about watching a play or a film or reading a book, is you can see a lifetime pass in a few hours. The uneventul days of life are skipped over because they are, well, uneventful. It's the living of those hours and days and the tedium they bring that become difficult sometimes.
For example. I was reading an article of mine today that got published. I barely remember writing it. But I would sitll like to do another. Just no motivation to do it. It's been..six months maybe? since I wrote that short piece on VoIP. And longer than that since I've written anything funny. Though I do have drafts of pieces of things, I want to be able to send something final and yet I have no motivation to do it.
I read GTD a few weeks ago. Organization and such, but as much as I think the book is useful and bringing order from chaos, there's nothing to spurn the need for order. What if, in my life, I need the chaos. it has, in the past been probably one of the best motivators.
Adn in the mean time, I still can't work up the spine to call J back. Though I should. And I have, I suppose, no reason not to. I just don't have any real reason TO. That, I think, is the hardest part about the rambling and insomnia. Monotonous hours pass while I stay awake typing in a room that feels like it's 97 degrees with 130% humidity.
The neck pains are still there, but less headaches, less twitches in the arm and hand. I think that's good. Generally means less stress. But I still can't help shaking the feeling that the stress would be a good thing.
I did get new glasses which is nice. And things are progressing again steadily but I sit here waiting for some bombshell to drop to motivate necessary change. I don't see it coming but then I never do.
One of the nice things about watching a play or a film or reading a book, is you can see a lifetime pass in a few hours. The uneventul days of life are skipped over because they are, well, uneventful. It's the living of those hours and days and the tedium they bring that become difficult sometimes.
For example. I was reading an article of mine today that got published. I barely remember writing it. But I would sitll like to do another. Just no motivation to do it. It's been..six months maybe? since I wrote that short piece on VoIP. And longer than that since I've written anything funny. Though I do have drafts of pieces of things, I want to be able to send something final and yet I have no motivation to do it.
I read GTD a few weeks ago. Organization and such, but as much as I think the book is useful and bringing order from chaos, there's nothing to spurn the need for order. What if, in my life, I need the chaos. it has, in the past been probably one of the best motivators.
Adn in the mean time, I still can't work up the spine to call J back. Though I should. And I have, I suppose, no reason not to. I just don't have any real reason TO. That, I think, is the hardest part about the rambling and insomnia. Monotonous hours pass while I stay awake typing in a room that feels like it's 97 degrees with 130% humidity.
The neck pains are still there, but less headaches, less twitches in the arm and hand. I think that's good. Generally means less stress. But I still can't help shaking the feeling that the stress would be a good thing.
posted by rpalmeira | 12:08 AM
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